Tuesday, September 29, 2009

Awesomeness from Narrative Essays

1. We were laughing and carrying on, playing music and telling jokes, and trying to write a song.

2. I feel like the bad guy for putting pointed questions in there, like "Is everything alright?" and then signing with a big "I love you, Sebastian" or maybe with a cute nickname that I can't even write right now because it pisses me off.

3. Being new, he drifted around the lunch tables, not knowing where to sit.

4. He towered above me. His thick black combat boots, tan military pants and matching shirt supported his life thesis: To put his work before his family in order to become a higher ranking Navy officer than his father.

5. Racquel had always been a bad influence on me, from the time she convinced me to take all the chocolates out of my advent calendar on the first day of December to the time she forced me to climb the oak tree when she knew I wouldn't be able to get down.

6. Picture this, two eight-year-old girls in flannel nightgowns standing too close to a stove with a flame that is probably turned up too high.

7. I want to walk through Central Park in the snow, wearing boots, a trench coat, leather gloves, a fuzzy scarf and a warm hat over my leotard and tights.

8. I remember feeling invincible, like the hottest chick on Earth; I was Brittney Spears walking the red carpet while all the paparazzi attempted to get their million dollar shot of me. Girls wanted to be me — guys wanted to have me.

9. All I wanted was to run away, to scamper off stage, to no longer see the glaring red lights signaling the recording of hundreds of video cameras in the theater.

10. My father has always colored my life with the strangeness of his words.

11. Right before I reached the bathroom I saw her: Kate Mazzera. Five foot nine, blond, and as beautiful as a sunset on the horizon of an ocean.

12. He was almost like an older brother to me. In fact, that day I was wearing my treasured pink vans that were once his.

13. But the candy was right there on the counter, open to the public, and I didn't mean any harm; our intentions were precocious, mischievous at most, but not criminal.

14. I came from behind him and whispered, "I'll help you."

15. Pillars of multicolored balloons hung off every meter, mailbox, and street lamp.

16. What I was really apologizing for was that I had caused controversy, and my apologies were an attempt to blend back into the woodwork.

17. I failed to notice the slimy red liquid dribbling down my face, spreading onto my fuzzy footed onesie, and pooling on the floor.

18. Six boys and one more gathered in the musk of the Middle School boys' bathroom, the six lathering their serums of peer pressure upon the odd member of the group.

19. Awesome sentence NYT.

20. Awesome example essay.

Monday, September 28, 2009

Monday, September 21, 2009

Week 5

Excellent posts last week. Loved the words you found in your pieces.

This week try to focus on how the writer involves the reader. Good narrative pieces (this is not to say all of your readings are narrative pieces) engage the reader on some level. How do your writers do it?

Thursday, September 17, 2009

Amazingness from Descriptive Essays

1. He had left his hat behind. He had left his hat behind along with me.

2. From her perspective the excitement of the trip was tempered by the challenge of sheparding two young children swiftly and safely through the large and potentially unsafe environment that was the San Francisco International Airport; ...

3. Once I step into the cold air that's rarely circulated, my eyes immediately puff up, my skin becomes purplish-white, and without fail, whatever I'm wearing make me look like a dork.

4. With my brain bursting at the seams, only held together by the thin thread of will, I saw down next to her.

5. A tree, a towering red fir, has also been unable to resist the downpour. Our tent had broken its fall.

6. Time seemed obnoxiously slow as I sat on my knees, hacking away at the roots of the thistles.

7. And because I had five hours all to myself, I was fully able to discover the details of airport anxiety.

8. It is so empty, so vacant, so barren.

9. After learning face after face in my exchange school where every small child or young girl wanted to hear me speak my English, here was a pristine face just gazing out of its frame, allowing me silent contemplation.

10. A tree to my right, bright green and fresh, reached to welcome the approaching storm.

11. At times like these, I would trudge up to my room, struggling to lift my lead feet up each step (it's hard to walk when the world is ending), and fling myself on my bed and shut my eyes. Sob sob. Sniffle. Sob sob.

12. Regal pillars guided us toward a relatively small concert hall.

13. I'm worn out and staggering along to make it to the gate.

14. Across the bridge was the city, sparkling as if it knew we were watching.

15. Mike exhales: it seems as though he's been holding his breath since the sun started setting.

16. It was a long, hot September afternoon at the Marin Ballet school, and the air smelled of lemon, begonias and the sweet perspiration of about thirty teenage girls.

17. I had gone to New York City (yes, "The Big Apple" or "The City That Never Sleeps") with just the slightest bit of trepidation; I was a youngling who had grown too attached to her nest, my family and group of friends more like security blankets than comfort.

18. Many fight limbo by stuffing themselves in a book; some arm themselves with decibels and try their luck with an iPod or a phone. Then there are those that have abandoned themselves to defeat and now are lost victims to the eerie urgency of the airport: the kind that look as though they live here in their suits, locked into a laptop, scurrying their fingers over the keyboard; the kind of people that use bodywash instead of soap.

Sunday, September 13, 2009

Week 4

Ok, we looked at some sentences, now find some something in the diction that stands out. Maybe it's a word combination, the use of simple words, a word bomb that makes you reach for the dictionary.

Keep sharing your great ideas. LOVE the posts so far. Excellent work.

Monday, September 7, 2009

Week 3

You all posted some awesome lines and some great comments on why those lines stood out. Now, I want you to focus on sentence structure. Look for a sentence that moves beyond, way beyond, the subject-verb creation and dazzles you with either a fun piece of punctuation or an interesting structure. Then again, maybe your writer has a case of subject-verb-itis and repeats the same pattern so many times it makes you want to scream. Share and amaze .... and remember to post by Sunday.

In other news -- here's a good read about the precision of words. Maybe you're a little obsessed with the English language, too, and would like to learn more. After Deadline, a NYTimes blog, is a great place to start.

Tuesday, September 1, 2009

Week 2

What amazing sentence, phrase, moment would you like to share from your writer/blog? Wow us with your selection and tell us why you think your selection is wow inducing. And, wow inducing can be good, bad or ugly.