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Monday, October 5, 2009
Week 7
We've looked at crafty words, high powered sentences, now let's focus on opening lines. Post the opening line to your selection and comment on its success or failures.
"High school reunions are famed for their angst-inducing potential."
For me, this opening line is REALLY good. It instantly hooks me and makes me want to know more. What I love about it is how true the statement is. I can notice Brotman's sort of sarcastic tone, and yet the truth about what people think of high school reunions. I think Brotman is successful in this article in captivating the reader. Let's read on about their (reunions) "angst-inducing potential".
"Every year, an average of 38 million sharks are finned – that is, dragged aboard a boat to have their fins cut off — according to a 2006 study by Shelley Clarke, a fisheries scientist at the Imperial College of Conservation Science based in London."
I like this opening line, but it is not the greatest opening line ever. The reason I like it is because it sets the stage for the argument to be presented. The main reason I did not like the article was because there wasn't much of an argument. I learned about a shark sanctuary but I didn't really learn more than that.
"Every year, an average of 38 million sharks are finned – that is, dragged aboard a boat to have their fins cut off — according to a 2006 study by Shelley Clarke, a fisheries scientist at the Imperial College of Conservation Science based in London."
I like this opening line, but it is not the greatest opening line ever. The reason I like it is because it sets the stage for the argument to be presented. The main reason I did not like the article was because there wasn't much of an argument. I learned about a shark sanctuary but I didn't really learn more than that.
"From the moment it secures a health-care bill -- yes, it will get one -- right through the 2010 midterm elections, the Obama administration will be all about jobs, jobs, jobs."
Dionne grabs your attention in the opening statement with the successful use of the dashes and the strongly stated opinion both within the dashes and at the end of the sentence. He doesn't just think that the Obama administration will pass a bill - they will. He doesn't just think that it's all about jobs - it just is. It's also very powerful that the entire opening paragraph is just this sentence. You want to read on to understand how he will prove what seem to be simply opinion stated as fact.
"Just because you're paranoid doesn't mean that someone's not after you."
This opening sentence hooked me because the writer is paraphrasing a popular quote from a Nirvanna song. By paraphrasing something like a song quote, I get a little preview of what's going to happen later in the piece based on what I know about the song lyric.
"The nine-pound longhaired miniature dachshund at the animal shelter wasn’t the kind of dog I imagined walking in Manhattan."
I like the detail in this sentence, and how it places the story in a specific location from the start, but other than that it didn't catch my attention the way some openers do. I like shorter punchier sentences that are either very strange or controversial; they make me curious about the story and an instantly more active and attentive reader.
"There are certain foods I don’t eat: pizza, pasta, rice, bread. And with the exception of wine, I don’t drink any beverage that has more than 10 calories, which means when I go to restaurants I end up looking as if I’m titrating liquids between glasses and decanters like some mad scientist."
Ok, I'm cheating a little - these are the first two sentences, not one. However, they definitely work together as a package. The first is short and straight-forward while the second continues on with the idea in a much more descriptive and comical manner. Together they successfully introduce the author's neurotic eating habits in a humorous way. Though I am not head over heels for this opener, it definitely made me chuckle and propelled me through the rest of the piece.
I was really into this opening line. The full excerpt is: "All in. All out. Double down. Withdraw." The short epic phrases provide (at least to me) the pummeling momentum behind the article's issue: the war in the Middle East. The stark inflexibility of those lines is powerful, which is exactly what Noonan wanted for her opening.
"Let us hypothesize for a moment that you have everything you could ever need on this hot, sticky speck of planet: Loads of love, great sex, good food, shelter, cash, affordable health care, good teeth, shiny car, kids who don't hate you, the works."
I think this fist line works well. It sets the stage for the rest of the article and gets the reader immediately involved. It is also witty like most of his work, which also sets the reader up for the rest of the article. Overall, pretty effective.
"Summers have stories in a way that’s true of no other season."
I think that this is an excellent opening sentence. It has a good hook and it immediately makes the reader intrigued. Automatically, I'm clamoring to know what the rest of the story is going to be about. In addition, it also brings up images of summer; I had never thought how summer can be synonymous with story-telling but the more I think about it, the more I agree with her.
"So I was peacefully drinking my coffee this morning, and was accosted by someone waving the latest WSJ editorial on the dollar in my face, demanding my reaction."
This was a good first line because it made me want to read the rest. What was his reaction? Who was this person? And the following lines were humorous and perfectly answered the questions that went though my head when reading the first line. It honestly wasn't an amazing first line, but it was a great set up line.
In the fall of 1979, I headed off to college with mixed feelings and new stuff: a Brother typewriter, a hot pot, and a portable black-and-white television.
This opening sentence provided an image, but it had little to do with the actual point of the essay. I did not find this line to be particularly compelling or mysterious. One thing I did like about it was the sense it provided of a different time: when people used typewriters and watched black-and-white TV. This time in and of itself seems nostalgic and romantic, which was appealing. Caitlin Flanagan weaves her essay out of this opening sentence in a skillful way and ties the ending back to the beginning, but the first sentence would not give the reader a good idea as to the subject matter of the essay. I would say that the sentence worked well with regard to the rest of the essay, but would not have convinced anyone not already interested to read the piece.
"Essay contests don't generally get a lot of mainstream attention."
Not the most exciting opening line ever, and frankly it wasn't the most exciting article so far. This line begins the opening three-sentence paragraph that ends, basically, with a dramatic "Until now, dun dun duhhh." Maybe that's too harsh a mockery, but the article just summarizes and explains the effects of some other article. I would have rather read the other article.
"Some things have changed since the “Mad Men” era."
I think this is a great opening line because it draws the reader in with its ambiguity. Dowd doesn't specify what these "some things" are until later on in the essay. The rest of the essay is very analytical of men and women and a bit sarcastic. I think that this opening line perfectly sets the tone for the rest of her essay.
"The Nobel committee did President Obama no favors by prematurely awarding him its peace prize."
I don't think this opening line is as creative as some from Friedman's past articles, but it fits this article very well. It clearly, and quite strongly, expresses his opinion right off the bat. I also liked how he didn't just say "the Nobel committee did not do President Obama any favors," rather he switched up the syntax, which strengthened the line's impact on the reader. Also, the word "prematurely" adds a little "zing" to his argument.
"I SUPPOSE there is something charming about watching conservative politicians in Texas trying so ardently to preserve a same-sex marriage."
I like this opening sentence. It serves its purpose as a hook because of the when it is read, there is an emphasis on the word suppose from the capitalization. It adds a sarcastic tone that resonates with my beliefs of the point of view of conservatives. From the opening sentence, I got a lot of information about what she is going to write about before I started reading the article.
18 comments:
"High school reunions are famed for their angst-inducing potential."
For me, this opening line is REALLY good. It instantly hooks me and makes me want to know more. What I love about it is how true the statement is. I can notice Brotman's sort of sarcastic tone, and yet the truth about what people think of high school reunions. I think Brotman is successful in this article in captivating the reader. Let's read on about their (reunions) "angst-inducing potential".
"Every year, an average of 38 million sharks are finned – that is, dragged aboard a boat to have their fins cut off — according to a 2006 study by Shelley Clarke, a fisheries scientist at the Imperial College of Conservation Science based in London."
I like this opening line, but it is not the greatest opening line ever. The reason I like it is because it sets the stage for the argument to be presented. The main reason I did not like the article was because there wasn't much of an argument. I learned about a shark sanctuary but I didn't really learn more than that.
"Every year, an average of 38 million sharks are finned – that is, dragged aboard a boat to have their fins cut off — according to a 2006 study by Shelley Clarke, a fisheries scientist at the Imperial College of Conservation Science based in London."
I like this opening line, but it is not the greatest opening line ever. The reason I like it is because it sets the stage for the argument to be presented. The main reason I did not like the article was because there wasn't much of an argument. I learned about a shark sanctuary but I didn't really learn more than that.
"From the moment it secures a health-care bill -- yes, it will get one -- right through the 2010 midterm elections, the Obama administration will be all about jobs, jobs, jobs."
Dionne grabs your attention in the opening statement with the successful use of the dashes and the strongly stated opinion both within the dashes and at the end of the sentence. He doesn't just think that the Obama administration will pass a bill - they will. He doesn't just think that it's all about jobs - it just is. It's also very powerful that the entire opening paragraph is just this sentence. You want to read on to understand how he will prove what seem to be simply opinion stated as fact.
"Just because you're paranoid doesn't mean that someone's not after you."
This opening sentence hooked me because the writer is paraphrasing a popular quote from a Nirvanna song. By paraphrasing something like a song quote, I get a little preview of what's going to happen later in the piece based on what I know about the song lyric.
"The nine-pound longhaired miniature dachshund at the animal shelter wasn’t the kind of dog I imagined walking in Manhattan."
I like the detail in this sentence, and how it places the story in a specific location from the start, but other than that it didn't catch my attention the way some openers do. I like shorter punchier sentences that are either very strange or controversial; they make me curious about the story and an instantly more active and attentive reader.
"There are certain foods I don’t eat: pizza, pasta, rice, bread. And with the exception of wine, I don’t drink any beverage that has more than 10 calories, which means when I go to restaurants I end up looking as if I’m titrating liquids between glasses and decanters like some mad scientist."
Ok, I'm cheating a little - these are the first two sentences, not one. However, they definitely work together as a package. The first is short and straight-forward while the second continues on with the idea in a much more descriptive and comical manner. Together they successfully introduce the author's neurotic eating habits in a humorous way. Though I am not head over heels for this opener, it definitely made me chuckle and propelled me through the rest of the piece.
PS The title should get props; "No Polenta, No Cry"
"All in."
I was really into this opening line. The full excerpt is: "All in. All out. Double down. Withdraw." The short epic phrases provide (at least to me) the pummeling momentum behind the article's issue: the war in the Middle East. The stark inflexibility of those lines is powerful, which is exactly what Noonan wanted for her opening.
"Let us hypothesize for a moment that you have everything you could ever need on this hot, sticky speck of planet: Loads of love, great sex, good food, shelter, cash, affordable health care, good teeth, shiny car, kids who don't hate you, the works."
I think this fist line works well. It sets the stage for the rest of the article and gets the reader immediately involved. It is also witty like most of his work, which also sets the reader up for the rest of the article. Overall, pretty effective.
"Summers have stories in a way that’s true of no other season."
I think that this is an excellent opening sentence. It has a good hook and it immediately makes the reader intrigued. Automatically, I'm clamoring to know what the rest of the story is going to be about. In addition, it also brings up images of summer; I had never thought how summer can be synonymous with story-telling but the more I think about it, the more I agree with her.
"So I was peacefully drinking my coffee this morning, and was accosted by someone waving the latest WSJ editorial on the dollar in my face, demanding my reaction."
This was a good first line because it made me want to read the rest. What was his reaction? Who was this person? And the following lines were humorous and perfectly answered the questions that went though my head when reading the first line. It honestly wasn't an amazing first line, but it was a great set up line.
In the fall of 1979, I headed off to college with mixed feelings and new stuff: a Brother typewriter, a hot pot, and a portable black-and-white television.
This opening sentence provided an image, but it had little to do with the actual point of the essay. I did not find this line to be particularly compelling or mysterious. One thing I did like about it was the sense it provided of a different time: when people used typewriters and watched black-and-white TV. This time in and of itself seems nostalgic and romantic, which was appealing. Caitlin Flanagan weaves her essay out of this opening sentence in a skillful way and ties the ending back to the beginning, but the first sentence would not give the reader a good idea as to the subject matter of the essay. I would say that the sentence worked well with regard to the rest of the essay, but would not have convinced anyone not already interested to read the piece.
"Essay contests don't generally get a lot of mainstream attention."
Not the most exciting opening line ever, and frankly it wasn't the most exciting article so far. This line begins the opening three-sentence paragraph that ends, basically, with a dramatic "Until now, dun dun duhhh."
Maybe that's too harsh a mockery, but the article just summarizes and explains the effects of some other article. I would have rather read the other article.
"Some things have changed since the “Mad Men” era."
I think this is a great opening line because it draws the reader in with its ambiguity. Dowd doesn't specify what these "some things" are until later on in the essay. The rest of the essay is very analytical of men and women and a bit sarcastic. I think that this opening line perfectly sets the tone for the rest of her essay.
"The Nobel committee did President Obama no favors by prematurely awarding him its peace prize."
I don't think this opening line is as creative as some from Friedman's past articles, but it fits this article very well. It clearly, and quite strongly, expresses his opinion right off the bat. I also liked how he didn't just say "the Nobel committee did not do President Obama any favors," rather he switched up the syntax, which strengthened the line's impact on the reader. Also, the word "prematurely" adds a little "zing" to his argument.
"I SUPPOSE there is something charming about watching conservative politicians in Texas trying so ardently to preserve a same-sex marriage."
I like this opening sentence. It serves its purpose as a hook because of the when it is read, there is an emphasis on the word suppose from the capitalization. It adds a sarcastic tone that resonates with my beliefs of the point of view of conservatives. From the opening sentence, I got a lot of information about what she is going to write about before I started reading the article.
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