Monday, November 4, 2013
Weekly Post #8: the closer
Let's look for awesome closing (or near the end) lines. How does the author tie everything together? share an a-ha moment? conclude? make a call to action? Does the author come back to something mentioned at the start? Or maybe the author ends with a completely new idea? Share what works and what did not.
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In this blog post, my blogger writes about the holidays and holiday drinks. She shares a recipe for Crab Apple Vodka, which sounds unappealing to me for obvious reasons but also because I have a scrubby crab apple tree in my backyard that produces horrifyingly tasteless apples. Anyways, she wrote a longish spiel about the drink and the process of making it, the level of difficulty, etc, and ended the post with a sentence separate from the previous paragraph that looks like this, "Really, it’s that good." What she was saying, was that this drink is so good, that she encourages the reader to make extra to give away as holiday gifts. The ending is unique in that it stands apart from the main body paragraph and is a short, abrupt, and to the point ending. I think its success is that it shows a very definite opinion about the drink, therefore encouraging the reader to make it. It also is short and sweet. However, there is room for more description to successfully "sell" the drink.
Meghan Duam's, "Judge by ability, not age" talks about how the youth are losing their sense of adventure as they grow up because of "society imposing age restrictions". Her closer goes like this:
"In other words, we like our kids precocious but not particularly adventurous. And what kind of childhood is that?"
One thing that I really like about her closer is that she ends it with a question. She is inviting the readers to be part of the story by giving them the chance to voice their opinion. I also really like how she is questioning the social norm when she says that kids should learn to become mature; however, children are losing a sense of boldness. I like how she makes an observation about a common mindset but makes the audience really think about it. With this method, she is really engaging the reader till the very end.
I loved the ending of the most recent blog post of Boyt's that I read, where she finished an article about putting off cleaning her house like this:
"“Let’s do this,” I roared into the towering chaos."
I'm not quite sure what exactly it is about this sentence that feels poetic to me but I think what mainly drew me to it is connecting with Boyt over the fact that I too often feel like I have to "roar into the towering chaos" in order to psyche myself up before doing something seemingly arduous. Something I really like about Boyt's closers in general, is that they are pretty consistently short sentences that are often the most well constructed of the entire essay. This mechanism is very successful in my mind because it really leaves the reader wanting more!
I loved the ending of the most recent blog post of Boyt's that I read, where she finished an article about putting off cleaning her house like this:
"“Let’s do this,” I roared into the towering chaos."
I'm not quite sure what exactly it is about this sentence that feels poetic to me but I think what mainly drew me to it is connecting with Boyt over the fact that I too often feel like I have to "roar into the towering chaos" in order to psyche myself up before doing something seemingly arduous. Something I really like about Boyt's closers in general, is that they are pretty consistently short sentences that are often the most well constructed of the entire essay. This mechanism is very successful in my mind because it really leaves the reader wanting more!
I was tempted to make these a bit saltier because I do love sweet and salty desserts. But, I decided to keep the salty aspect dialed back so that all the glorious flavors of the crust, filling, and pecans could shine through. These little beauties are so buttery and utterly delicious.
I like this closing line because it brings everything together. She uses a common technique of the first person and tells the reader her thought process. In the beginning of the post she talks about these caramel pecan bars in a neural tone, just giving an overview. She brings it home by adding more personal aspect, talking about what she thought about adding and then what she actually ended up doing. The last line sums it up, telling the reader that these treats are special and delectable.
"One boat makes a jibe and Smith quips, 'Oop, look at that, they still don’t know how to jibe on Oracle. That’s a big gain. That’s where we think we have our biggest advantage.'"
In this particular article, Slade debates the strengths and weaknesses of both the Oracle and the Emirates teams. She does not seem to be too biased during the article until she begins throwing in quotes from a member of the Emirates team which make the reader doubt Oracle's abilities. I liked that she ended on the one listed above because it seems to be very ominous and definitely leaves the reader on the edge of their seat for the races ahead.
Duam consistently closes her posts with a line or two that directly addresses or brings in the reader. They end with a feeling of connectedness. I am so often finishing her essays and thinking "wow, she's so right" because she does such a great job of making whatever she just talked about, feel like it directly relates to me and my life. They are also pretty sharp and witty, and it leaves on a nice little bouncy punch that is very satisfying.
Here are a few of examples of her ending lines:
"See, you feel better already."
"When it comes to Portman, maybe we'd be wise to accept this dad as he is."
"What could be better, after all, than a government spy looking at your Facebook page and bitterly thinking, 'Wow, this person's life is way better than mine'?"
“Close, but not quite there: Miami, UCF, Oklahoma, Texas A&M, South Carolina.”
In this blog post Gene Wojciechowski writes about the Ohio State Buckeye’s football game. His articles usually always end with the ranking of different football teams. While he does not complete his articles with creative twist, he always gives his readers the standings of many teams. His articles are usually broken up into different sections: Pregame Speech, First Quarter, Second Quarter, Halftime Speech, Third Quarter, Fourth Quarter, and Postgame. He is sports writer and thereby he writes about the different plays in the game.
With the Broncos having a bye week, I was curious to see what Paige would write about. Yet Paige did not have to look far, as the Broncos remained in the news because of coach John Fox's health concerns. After taking the reader through the play by play timeline of Fox's "heart attack", he discussed what the term meant for Fox, for football, and even for himself. In a much more personal and human article, Paige concluded with:
"He still has a Super Bowl to win this season.
Get well soon, John"
I think it's an interesting conclusion as he ties it back to the future of Broncos' football (he is a sports writer). But, those aren't the very last words. By ending with "Get well soon, John" and not the previous line, Paige shows that his health is of paramount importance to football. I enjoyed the change of pace, and think the last lines were fitting.
In one of Maureen Dowd's recent pieces, she takes on the conflict regarding the Washington Redskins and the controversy surrounding the offensive name. She starts by taking a more personal approach by talking to family members about the name and how there are more offensive things in the world of sports (the Cleveland Indian mascot). Anyways, she ends the article with this:
"All you have to do is watch a Western. The term "redskin" is never a compliment."
With these sentences, Dowd leaves the readers with one perspective of the issue; one that many agree with. I like how she makes the issue seem a lot less complicated by starting off with "all you have to do is..." I agree with her and think that the term "redskin" is offensive. With this statement, she ties together the thoughts from the article and ends with a very straightforward statement.
"It may be the worst trade in NFL history.
And it could've been only one person's idea.
Their mother's."
These are the three sentences tat closed the article that Rick Reilly wrote on John and Jim Harbaugh. After the Ravens won the superbowl, John decided to trade his best wide receiver to his younger brother Jim. The whole article goes one about why he did the trade and what the league thinks about it-- having a serious tone to it. And then he ends the article off by saying there is only one person who could have this idea; the mom. I love this ending. After reading about serious matters and involvement of the NFL, i think it is a perfect way to end it off and put some humor into the article.
“It’s not that Egypt doesn’t have a recipe for a democratic transition. It seems to lack even the basic mental ingredients.”
This is a slightly awkward closing sentence. To me, it seems like it would have been better used as an opening sentence. David Brooks’ article, “Defending the Coup”, starts with the sentence “The debate on Egypt has been between those who emphasize process and those who emphasize substance”, and the closing sentence does not really match up with that. And while the closing sentence does fit the middle of the article somewhat, at the end David Brooks is talking about how the American government has handled the coup, and then suddenly switches back to the Egyptian problem with it. It made me pause and re-read it to try and understand how the closing sentence fit in with the last two paragraphs he had written. Overall, it seems like he had two good opening lines, and picked one to put at the top and one to put at the end of the article.
“It’s not that Egypt doesn’t have a recipe for a democratic transition. It seems to lack even the basic mental ingredients.”
This is a slightly awkward closing sentence. To me, it seems like it would have been better used as an opening sentence. David Brooks’ article, “Defending the Coup”, starts with the sentence “The debate on Egypt has been between those who emphasize process and those who emphasize substance”, and the closing sentence does not really match up with that. And while the closing sentence does fit the middle of the article somewhat, at the end David Brooks is talking about how the American government has handled the coup, and then suddenly switches back to the Egyptian problem with it. It made me pause and re-read it to try and understand how the closing sentence fit in with the last two paragraphs he had written. Overall, it seems like he had two good opening lines, and picked one to put at the top and one to put at the end of the article.
The article I read this week was essentially a book report on Charles Taylor's "A Secular Age." David Brooks writes simplifies the book's complicated ideas about religion and it's changing role in our society, and explains Taylor's predictions on where the modern day's confluence of science, religion, and cultural acceptance is taking us. The closer of the article does not really expand on Taylor's ideas; Brooks just expresses his approval of Taylor's vision of a "future that is both open and also contains at least pockets of spiritual rigor."
Gail Collins usually ends her articles with a new idea. Sometimes the new idea will relate to the topic of the article, but it normally does not. I think it does not work because sometimes her articles need a conclusion instead of an off topic sarcastic comment at the end. Sometimes her endings work because they give you something to think about after reading the article.
"So despite the stumbles, false starts and coupon-busting results, it would be foolish to discount any contenders just yet."
This a rare sentence that Mark Ogden ends one of his articles with. This is one of the very few instances where he uses humor in his writing and to use it in his last sentence was classy. This sentence closes out the article in a great and interesting way because he has the main concluding idea surrounded by possible arguments against it. The humor comes from his language, the phrase "coupon-busting results" is a very funny way to say surprising results. This creativity makes the sentence better. Plus, the sentence structure of having three examples separated by commas helps it flow into a nice and clean ending.
The most recent article in Freeskier Magazine online was a remembrance of Tom Warnick, a 22 year old from Boulder, who passed away last week.
In closing the piece, the author says:
"These are the moments that Tom would never remember, but we could never forget. His unexpected passing last week took a heavy toll on his friends and family. Tom will always be remembered as a great friend and someone who wasn’t scared to break the mold."
I think that he did a very good job closing off this piece. First of all, the first sentence really punches and sticks out. It creates a distinction that is a little difficult to grasp due to how heavy the matter is, but that resonates a lot with the reader. Then closing it off mentioning that Warnick 'wasn't scared to break the mold' serves as a model for others, to mimic his way of not conforming necessarily to what other people want but just to be yourself, something that Warnick really embodied.
Kristof's article about early childhood education proved to be really interesting. Throughout the piece, he gives evidence in favor of the adoption of free preschool programs in the entirety of the country, but he is also unsure of the political agreements. He concludes the article with:
"So how about it, America?
Can we embrace “The Oklahoma Project” — not because it’s liberal or conservative, but because it’s what is best for our kids and our country?"
Rhetorical questions are utilized nicely, and the suggestive leading questions effectively portray his views on the issue. Clearly, he is for early education programs "because it's best for our kids," but again, he highlights political divisions. Because social programs like this are generally viewed as liberal, Kristof is unsure if Republicans will accept the programs and evidence. He does a good job of suggesting compromises (like naming the program "The Oklahoma Project" to lure conservatives) and makes his point very clear in the conclusion. I think it is a really successful ending to a great piece.
Dylan Desimone usually does not have very exciting endings. He is much more of an analytical and statistical writer and really focuses on key parts of a game. This is why his endings usually end with a big analytical fact or a theory on how a team will perform in the future. There are some pieces where he does a good job of ending the article with an interesting question to further interest the reader, but usually he ends with a cool statistic.
"We have so much to discuss. Thank God we’ve got 790 more days until the Iowa caucuses."
Here we have another witty closer by Gail Collins. As usual, she sarcastically jabs at anything and everything around her. It's funny, as usual, and does a great job of summing up her argument in a way that feels complete. It allows for further discussion outside the piece, but closes it up really nicely on its own.
Honestly, I'm a bit tired of her. Her writing week-to-week has little variety. This closing sentence is indicative of this. She always meets my expectations, but never exceeds them.
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